No words to say
Friend of mine who works closely with various NGOs called one of the churches in Johor -- a large church, she said -- to ask whether they could provide assistance to a particular village that is submerged. The families need to be evacuated, need shelter, need post-evacuation assistance like counselling, etc.
She spoke to the senior pastor's PA. "We do not have any involvement with the flood victims. Our church doesn't have any such activities. And that place is 100km away."
On the other hand, the Buddist and Sikh societies are going all out to help. She's now working with them instead. Not to mention swearing that she's not going to step foot in another church building from this day forward. (Yes, she's a Christian.)
Things like this leave me speechless. God forgive us, we're just too comfortable in our settled middle-class existence.
(originally posted on Jan 14, 2007)
I took down this post because I just didn't feel strongly enough about it. Yes, I was horrified, but more in a "I cannot believe he actually said that" way than a "You mean they are in the same state and don't even give a damn about the flood victims?" way. I count myself in the ranks of the apathetic, and I didn't feel I had a right to write about that guy when I myself am just as bad as he is. (Not to mention that I would probably compound my sins by lying about it. Oh wait, I just told the Internet the truth. WHAT HAVE I DONE?!?!?)
Anyway. If you stick around long enough and read enough blogs and talk to enough people, you'll hear lots of stories about churches & church leaders and what they are doing. A year or so ago, these stories would have make me furious; I'd have been ranting against church leaders and criticising the institutionalised church up and down, thinking about how many people have suffered because of the system / wrong teachings / leaders' manipulations / etc.
But these days I only feel a little sad. Maybe I'm getting numb. Or maybe it's a good sign, coz I ain't lettin' them things rile me up no more. So what if a church wants to spend millions putting up a huge building with all the latest and best facilities -- including a fully-equipped gym -- and I see no need for all of that? So what if a church guilts its members into giving towards this building by telling them that if they don't, God will curse their finances because they haven't been willing to sacrifice for His vision and His plan? [example only ah, I don't know of any church like this, okay. Don't get riled up in my stead ya]
Somehow I feel like... I'm out of those churches. I don't want to talk about them anymore. I don't want to care about what they're doing or not doing. There's no need to keep harping on all the things that are wrong or that I don't agree with. No need to 'jaga tepi kain orang' (nosily keep tabs on what others are doing).
I don't feel strongly enough to write about the things I hear and know. I don't feel strongly enough to be angry anymore or to insist that things should change. I don't feel strongly enough to make some noise in the hope that a few people will be jolted to rethink the things they've swallowed wholesale from church leaders or taken for granted for years. I just want to figure stuff out for myself and find my own place in the Christian world. Am I getting self-absorbed, or am I growing up? You tell me.