Weddings galore
Is this an auspicious year for weddings, or is it just something in the air? Seven of my friends & acquaintances are getting married within the first six months of this year. I've already attended two of those weddings and missed one (because I happened to be out of town on that particular day).
It feels like everybody around me just suddenly decided to up and get married. What on earth is happening?
It's not that I feel pressured to get married. Of course I do get all the, "So, when will your turn be, eh?" kinda questions, but since I WANT to be married, they don't bother me much. Maybe make me a little frustrated, that's all. Coz you know, I'd be very willing to be next in line. But it just ain't happening.
Friends try to console me, saying it's not "the right time" yet. I think that's true. Let me just get this clear: wanting to get married is not wrong. It doesn't mean I'm not contented with being single (I am) or that I'm "putting marriage ahead of God in my life" (which someone once accused me of doing). Give me a break.
Mom asked why I want to get married. I said, "Because I wanna have babies!" She said that's not a good reason for getting married. Well, I was being facetious. I mean, yeah, I do wanna have babies, but that isn't my main reason for wanting to be married. My main reason is... uh... um... well... does "It is not good for man to be alone" cut it? After all, that IS from the Holy Book... *grin*
Now I know when God said that, He was referring to Adam, but the thing is Eve wasn't made yet, so God couldn't include both sexes in that statement. If it isn't good for man to be alone, and woman was made to complement him & be his companion, then it follows that it can't be good for woman to be alone either... oh, never mind...
But it seems there's never a "right answer" for questions like these. If I say I am lonely, some smart alec will quote Hebrews 13:5b to me and say that I must not look to a man to fulfill, satisfy, or complete me. If I say that watching so many of my friends get married makes me yearn for the time when I myself shall walk down the aisle, I'm told that I have to wait for God's perfect timing and learn to trust Him more. If I say that I want to know what it is like to have someone special in my life, I'm told that I have to learn to be content as a single and to "seek first His kingdom and His righteousness" because then "all these things will be given to you as well" (another quotation from the Bible). In addition, everybody keeps on telling me to "stop looking" because, they say, "It will come when you're not looking", and as long as I'm looking, that elusive 'it' will perversely refuse to materialise. Which is very irritating.
All those things I've been told, things like I have to be patient and trust God and be content in my singleness and put God first in my life and not make marriage an idol and find fulfilment in God and not hope for a man to complete me, etc., etc., etc. are all true. But when all's said and done, I do still want to be married (for whatever reason) and all this just doesn't help! You can be content, and fulfilled, and trusting God, and whatever, but that doesn't mean you won't still long to be married, or wish for it. As fellow blogger Jen says, "Content is not equal to pain-free."