Talking method
I've always secretly believed I suck at prayer, so when Messy Christian said she sucks at prayer I could SO identify with that. I hear of people praying for hours and I wonder, don't they run out of things to say??!
Then a little voice challenged me: "Who says you have to talk all the time? Isn't prayer all about communication with God? Maybe they, whoever 'they' are, spent some of that time in quietness, listening for His voice...?"
But if that's true, it completely changes my idea of prayer. If I'm simply keeping quiet, how can I possibly be praying?? Praying, after all, is something I do, and if I'm not doing anything I can't possibly be praying. Or can I?
Then I remembered my comment on Messy Christian's post, saying that prayer is talking to God, and if you are talking to God all the time, you are literally praying all the time. But it sure doesn't feel like praying, and somehow we tend to feel as if it doesn't "count". As if it's only prayer if you're kneeling down and earnestly petitioning God about the 'serious stuff', like unreached people groups (ethnic groups who have not had the chance to hear the Christian message).
But then there's the praying for people part. This is where I REALLY suck. I have no idea how to pray for people. Oh, I have stock phrases, and I mean them, but I don't want to merely utter, "Please give this person strength to do what he knows is right, and wisdom to know the right thing to say at the right time." I want my prayer to be more personal, because I'm praying for an individual, with an individual's needs, hurts, and struggles. But I never know what to say. Although you may argue that it doesn't matter, since God knows what I mean anyway.
It gets worse when I'm praying in the presence of the pray-ee, coz then I really want the prayer to be a source of encouragement and life. I used not to worry about all this, believing that God would somehow guide my words even if I didn't feel or 'sense' that I was being led to pray for anything in particular. And once or twice, people have told me that they were touched by my words, that I'd put my finger on some of the issues they'd been facing lately and echoed other things they believed God had been trying to tell them. But nowadays, I guess you could say I've lost that childlike faith in God's unobtrusive guiding, and I get frustrated with myself because I feel helpless. I don't have the right words to help encourage, comfort, heal.
I also don't know why I feel like my prayer is ineffective if I just say a simple, "You know her needs -- help her, Father." I have to cover all the bases: pray for protection, good health, close family relationships, financial providence, wisdom, guidance, career success, and so on. I sometimes wonder if anyone has been tempted to doze off while I prayed one of these horribly comprehensive prayers over them ;)