The Wilful Sunflower

On the theme of "Whom to you run to"...

That incident with Dad made me realise how instinctive it is run to Daddy when I need help or advice. And it made me think about how I seem to automatically run to Papa God when I'm in trouble. Almost as if it were, well, instinctive. Hmmm.

So I'm starting to see that it's natural for me to run to God when I'm in dire straits. It's natural to turn to Him for help, to ask, and even to EXPECT Him to intervene on my behalf. Because, after all, He is my Papa. If He were an earthly father you would still expect him to step in. Oh, he might give you a lecture, he might still ground you or find a way to make you "learn a lesson", but he'd definitely rescue you from ruination or utter calamity. (Yes, I'm so dramatic. Didn't you know it?)

This is a revelation to me because I've never, ever in my entire life -- all of 25 years, 5 months and 7 days -- heard a preacher refer to this instinct in a positive way. And remember, I practically grew up in church.

No, this instinct was always used against me. Preachers would say, "You always run to God when you have problems, but when things are going smoothly, do you really walk with Him? No! You don't read His Word (the Bible), you don't pray, but, bang! -- when something happens, you're there pleading with God to rescue you!"

And I always felt so tremendously guilty about this. That I had to get in trouble before I would seek God and start talking to Him earnestly and try to establish some sort of closer relationship with Him. That the times I pray the most (and the hardest) are when I'm in dire straits. Why can't I also be as fervent when things are going smoothly? I'd ask myself, feeling like a horrible hypocrite.

But I now realise that running to God when I'm in trouble is not just a good thing, it's practically AUTOMATIC! There's an instinct inside of us that tells us Whom to run to when we need help. Deep inside us, we know and we know and we know that there is Someone Out There looking out for us. This explains why when all else fails and we're at the end of our rope, many desperate people begin to pray. Whether or not they believe in God is a moot question. They pray. It is a running back to God not unlike the way the prodigal son ran back to his loving father.

If someone could have explained this to me before, I could have been saved a lot of anguish. As anybody who reads this blog regularly will know, I think too much: I remember countless times when I'd dug myself into a hole, I'd plead with God to help me, half-afraid that He wouldn't. After all, why should He help me, when it was my own fault I was in this mess? It was hard to trust that God didn't hold against me the fact that I'd only gone to Him when I needed help. "Good riddance," I could just hear Him say. "Who asked you to ignore Me all this while?"

But if God planted that instinct within us to cause us to run to Him for shelter... I think He is waiting for us with open arms, like the father in the prodigal son story I mentioned earlier. Ready, nay, eager to help!

Not only that, relationships are complicated. Do you call your father every day? I don't. But, if you were in trouble, wouldn't you be able to pick up the phone and call, and know he'd be there for you? -- ok, even if your father is not like that, remember that God is the perfect Father. How on earth did I ever get the idea that He might be reluctant to help me??!

Sure, prior to that point in time I might not have been enjoying the closest relationship with Him. I might not have talked to Him for ages. Perhaps I was even in rebellion. But don't you think God would willingly help me anyway? He is faithful where we are faithless. And the instinct -- that instinct He planted in me -- that is what keeps me coming back. That is what He uses to keep reminding me, "Hey, come home to Me, My daughter. I'm here, waiting for you. Come home."