The Wilful Sunflower

Last night, a friend I haven't seen in months suddenly called me up and invited me for dinner. We went out, and as we sat down at the table I saw something twinkling on the fourth finger of her left hand. She's engaged!!

Speaking of her fiancé, she said, "He accepts me for who I am. He doesn't mind that I'm loud, that I talk so much, that I'm messy. In fact, a few times he even came over to my place and washed my clothes for me! He says I come in a package - that my forgetfulness and everything else is what makes me who I am."

Wow. So such men DO exist. (hehee)

It's such an encouragement because sometimes, it's hard to believe that there will come a man who will appreciate me for the who I am, who will embrace all the things that, together, make up the person who is me.

See, in my family, I seem to be the changeling. My parents are disciplined, organised, goal-oriented, logical, and practical. Although I do have a practical streak, I'm also idealistic and sentimental; I was known for daydreaming, and have always enjoyed creative pursuits such as writing, sketching, making cards, and playing the piano. To my practical parents, these things don't count. They're of no real use, no real value.

It's kinda hard when you have other people affirming you and telling you stuff like, "You write so well!" when your parents never bother to say so. I've felt like my gifts and talents are meaningless and worthless, and - by extension - I've also felt that there must be something wrong with me, because I can't be like my parents.

So anyway, when my loved ones, those supposedly closest to me, can't understand, it's hard to believe that some day someone might come along who will not only love me for who I am, but will also encourage me to be all I can be, and celebrate my uniqueness...

Back to my friend and her fiancé: Sharon told me that on their first date, he invited her to a formal company dinner. "They served prawns, and everybody else was delicately handling the prawns with their chopsticks and spoon. I went right ahead and used my fingers to peel the prawns, and I thought he'd be thinking, 'Oh no! What's she doing? I'll never invite this girl out again!'. But he not only didn't mind, he began to peel the prawns with his hands, right alongside me!"

According to her, he found her very natural, unaffected - no masks. "At the dinner, the other girls were so demure and quiet. I was chatty. And he liked it!" He apparently thought her different from the other girls he'd met.

Thank You, God... for reassuring me that such men DO exist! :D